Thursday, July 29, 2010

Classy Decor

Seeing as JS may NEVER get ‘round to hanging my Mexican décor that I painstakingly scored from the infamous flea market…..  Guess what you all are getting for Christmas!?

Now, now, no fighting!  I want my two biggest ‘Mexican flair’ fans to rest easy.  I promise to save the best pieces for both of you.  In fact, if you read their comments after the flea market blog you can see for yourselves they both were shouting for BIGGER, more COLORFUL, more GLORIUOS pottery.  Now ask yourself, who wouldn’t want a little bit of this action?

The Green Squirrel is particularly aggressive.  He's not a big fan of solicitation.  

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Delicious Morsel

At the risk of being forbidden to babysit two of my most FAVORITE chil'ren ever again, I post this tasty little morsel. 

Honestly, I had to take control before JS thought to blackmail me with this sneaky bit of footage... 

Disclaimer:  The following is a clip of some silly shenanigans that Aunt Gator let the Punkins get into when Mom and Dad were out for the night.  I promise no wait staff or other patrons witnessed the following!  Please also notice, there were ZERO objections from the camera man.  

How a dessert SHOULD be eaten:

I'm almost certain I've seen Grandpa Ace use some of the same techniques.  I also think it's hysterical how Baby K is totally contemplating getting into the action.

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Flea Market Friends

Madre called a few weeks ago and hinted that she was missing me and JS and somehow I tricked her into coming to stay with me.  Beginning three days prior to her arrival I received no less than 5 emails a day about our weekend itinerary and finally, she asked, could she bring her geriatric, cat hair shedding, couch hogging, Joe Dog?


Let me explain my reluctance… Joe Dog and I have a little bit of a history. Before I was a dog person Mom rescued Joe from his imminent euthanasia and we all fell in love with his gorgeous eyes and sleek black and white hide.  He was such a nice loving dog and you could tell he was oh, so grateful to have a nice loving home.

Then there were 'the dog sitting incidents.'  Not one but TWO separate incidents and probably more that I somehow managed to forget.  The first incident involved me opening the front door to a dark horrendous smell and a treacherously squishy footstep, right into diarrhea hell.  What’s a house/dog sitter to do?  Flee the scene, right?  An hour and 5 rolls of paper towels later, I had managed to clean the shit storm off of the walls and the ENTIRE stairwell.  Unfortunately, the carpet could not be saved… 

The second incident involved opening the front door, Joe Dog pushing me down to the ground and running over the top of my body with his comrade and fellow jerk dog Astro in tow, headed straight for the highway.  Against my better judgment I did manage to chase them down with my car, refrain from actually running them over and shamed them/scared them with threat of serious bodily injury into my car and back into the house.
 Nowadays, Joe Dog cruises around with a superior, super fat dog attitude AND since he’s getting old, Mom kicks me off the couch so the old man can rest in his favorite spot.  However, since Mom is the best hostess EVER and often agrees to dog sit both of my stinky, butt snuggling, sniveling (mostly Bella) baby dogs I could only answer yes. 

Wide Load

Joe Dog arrived Friday afternoon towing Madre behind him on a ski rope.  I’m not kidding.  He really has a ski rope.  I keep telling Mom we can get her some Wheelies and she’d be the coolest cat in town but she refuses, stating a previous injury while being walked by Joe that involved slippery shoes, a close encounter with a sidewalk, a Good Samaritan or maybe it was a Police man who observed the entire accident, and some serious road rash.  Whatev…  I still think she’d be cool.  Throw in a hot pink helmet with flames, matching elbow and knee guards and you have a recipe for EFFING AWESOMENESS. 

 So Joe Dog, first thing off the bat, purposefully stomps my toe and ruins my painstakingly self-applied pedicure.  Arrgh!  This earned him a big fat tranquilizer and a nice bed on my couch, in hopes he would settle down and lay still.  My Our greatest fear was to return home to find Joe had scratched thru my front door had wedged his HUGE dog body halfway thru the dog door, stuck there sadly until our return home.  But we didn’t worry long.  We made a hasty retreat and forgot our concerns over some delicious food and a shared Mexican Martini.

Saturday we were up early and off to a scrumptious breakfast at the Magnolia Café before we toured one of my patient’s beautiful gardens.  Excuse the iphone photos here and use your imaginations! 

 Purple House Window Box with Kitta Accoutrements

Blurry Flowers with Special Blurry Mexican Artwork

Water Feature with Neat Unidentifiable Things in Foreground

Mosquito Haven

Great Rug But I’m Getting Dizzy From Blood Loss

Inspired, we hit the Flea Market where we scored some amazing Mexican pottery to spice up our own homes and gardens.

Madres Mexican Pot
Hibiscus Inside Mexican Planter

Piglets Para Mi Madre

My Collection:
En Nombre de Padre e hijo y Espíritu Santo

Rana = el Frog-o

Ardilla Verde = Squirrel Green

Next stop on our carefully scheduled itinerary was the City Wide Garage Sale where Mom found some great linens.  After I spotted a pair of real glass eyeballs in a jewelry case, nicely mixed in with old wedding bands and ear rings, I sort of lost my shit cool.  I might have even startled a few fellow shoppers when I yelled out, “Tell me you aren't seriously going to buy that!?  Someone probably DIED on that quilt!”  Lucky for us, Mom only bought linens for table cloths.  Not to actually sleep on, but for eating purposes.  Awesome.

Bella Approves of the Linens

Linens in Action

JS demanded something magic at the garage sale but seeing how the crystal ball was out of our price range, I settled for a nifty Henna tattoo.  A bracelet so to speak.  Unfortunately, this week I had a hissy fit at the beginning of a very long, hate spiral type of day, and I tried to scrub it off in the shower.  Now it pretty much looks like I have leprosy.  Neat.

Day One

We finished our Saturday by taking my dogs to the vet.  Bella struggled for her life and ended up with two really awesome arm bandages covering her two really large hematomas.  She totally pranced outa that place looking like The Hulk wearing sweat bands.  I wanted to get pictures but I was afraid to leave the bandages on too long.  I’m not sure they make a wheelchair for little dogs that have lost both front limbs… 

Any who, Joe Dog survived multiple abandonments over the weekend, Mom and I had a spectacular visit and other than finding Joe hair in my food every once in awhile since they’ve left, there has been no lasting injury from Joe’s visit. I actually hope they still speak to me after this post will come back real soon!

Saturday, July 10, 2010

The Nanny Daiquiris

The Nanny Daiquiris Diaries

A few weeks ago I got to play Aunt Gator “The Nanny” whilst my Dearest Sister and Brother In Law came to visit ATX.  This experience convinced me that I’m truly:  A) The Coolest Aunt/Sister EVER, hands down and you all should be extremely envious.  B) I REALLY could get used to living the Resort Life while sitting poolside everyday and  C) I’m not ready for any children of my own for at least the next 10-20 years.  Mimi, you better start praying for accidents "Blessings from Jesus” if you want grandbabies from the Gator/JS contingent anytime soon

Seriously, I have the most beautiful and sweet niece and nephews EVER!  I pray every day for just a few more so that I can complete my Polo team.  Lord knows we would frickin’ CRUSH the competition as they are all tougher than nails and masters of coordination.  Somehow they got my share of both.

The following is a narration in pictures of our adventures. 

Coffee, milk and destruction to start the day. 
Baby K single handedly rearranged the entire playscape.

Doin' Work.

Demolition complete, Baby K sets her sights on her next priority....

A small tumble over a giant lego does not halt her progression.  After she showed that lego who was boss, Baby K is only slightly peeved about the dirt on her hands and the icky landscaping remnants in her diaper.

Where's the buffett?  I'm famished. 

Gold Feesh and Vitamin Dirt!  DELICIOUS!

Revitalized after her snack, Baby K practices her horsemanship.  She's a natural!

Asleep at the wheel. 
Baby K is totally rockin' that mohawk!


Baby K tires of the endless stalking from her Paparazzi
 and signs off with a squeal and a funny face.

I spot a Monkey!

Nope.  No Monkeys here.  Just a Pooh Bear.

J is WAY to cool for school and refuses to pose for the camera.

The chase is on.  Aunt Gator is no match for the elusive wildebeast

Oops!  Not ours...  But the shoelessness greatly amuses me.

J at the controls.

Adios Amigos!  We have grubbin' and naps to tend to.

No hands!
Mommy was mollifying Baby K's teradactyl screams and thus distracted
while we pulled silly shenanigans at the restaurant.  I'm am awesome influence.

Shut down...  We get scolded when Mommy caught on :)

LOVES of my life!  Please come back soon!  We have lots of trouble fun to make !